The title of this column is “It’s Only My Opinion.” Last week, I offered some of my personal opinions of last year. In the interest of space I pared my list down and will now present several more which are informative, entertaining and sure to stimulate conversation when it slows down at your next cocktail party. Let’s start with a smile.
Best non-hurtful practical joke of the year was a note I left on a friend’s door which read, “Hey there – I came to see you. I’m sorry you were not home. Signed Michael Anthony, executive secretary for John Beresford Tipton.” I’m sorry you were not home? Not half as sorry as you are.
The super-storm of the year, Sandy, has forever erased the 50-year-old question asked by northerners of their Floridian friends: “How can you live in Florida? They’re always having hurricanes.”
Of course, 2012 will be remembered as the year we lost Twinkies and along with them another 18,000 jobs. The executives were walking away with big bucks while the union contracts were loaded with lots of unnecessary mega- expenses. Who’s at fault? A great big combination of both. Twinkies, like so many other American icons, will soon be another imported product, probably from across the close borders of Mexico or Canada.
The cover up of the year was the Benghazi attack. Will the White House ever tell us what really happened? Will we ever learn the truth? Will Hillary ever divulge what Axelrod promised her? Will Susan Rice ever tell us the names of those who wrote her script? Stay tuned for accuracy, which may come in 20 years.
Runner up in the cover up department – Joe Paterno protecting pedophile Jerry Sandusky. If they put Sandusky in the general population section of the prison, we will see true justice.
The quote of the year is — No! Make that the quote of the decade is — “I apologize to the voters, my colleagues, my family, but most importantly, to my wife.” It’s been said, and will continue to be said, by many of our elected officials. For the sake of some extracurricular activities, many a great career has been blown.
The best back-to-back billboards were erected outside of our hotel in Kansas City. One read, “Never trust a skinny chef!” and the other, “Life is short! Eat dessert first!” Somebody in Cowtown has been opening a lot of fortune cookies.
My most disappointing person of the year is Sen. Charles Schumer, for not speaking out on behalf of Israel. If he, in fact, did, somebody please tell me when and where. Perhaps he made a few comments in a little shul on a Shabbos where TV cameras dare not go, in front of a handful of congregants. Nice try, Chuck.
Thugs of the year are the Wisconsin schoolteachers who demonstrated, sat in, slept in, left filth and rubbish, broke windows, and caused $7 million in damages to state property. Teachers of the Cheese State teach democracy, but don’t practice it.
The rat of the year is Chief Justice John Roberts, a hero to the freeloaders, a traitor to me.
The most generous person of the year is President Obama. He continued to give away billions in entitlements. It’s easy to give away somebody else’s money.
I am StanGershb
©2013 Community News Group
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