Today’s news:

Road rage escalates when motorist retrieves ax

Brooklyn Daily

94th Precinct

Greenpoint–Northside

Sharpest tool

Cops cuffed a motorist who they say tried to attack another driver with an ax on Eckford Street on April 30, then slammed the victim’s leg in his own car door — all over a measly parking spot.

The 62-year-old victim reported that he was trying to park his vehicle at the corner of Graham Avenue at 1:40 pm when another driver who was also trying to snag the spot yelled at him.

The suspect then grabbed an ax out of his car and ran towards the victim, brandishing it, police stated. The victim tried to jump back in his car, but the assailant slammed the victim’s car door on on his leg, officers said. The 39-year-old suspect was arrested and charged with assault.

Choking on his words

A suspect was arrested after he allegedly choked a man on a Nassau Avenue subway staircase when the two got into an argument on April 27.

The victim told police he was inside the G train station at Manhattan Avenue at 11:30 pm when a man started mouthing off to him. The loose-lipped lowlife then grabbed the 29-year-old victim’s neck and squeezed, police reported.

The victim was able to pry the suspect’s hands away and call police. Cops cuffed the 23-year-old suspect and charged him with assault.

Picking a fight

A robber’s plan to break into a West Street apartment on April 28 went awry when it turned out the tenant was home, a report states.

The 39-year-old victim said he was sleeping at his home between Huron and Green streets at noon when he heard the sound of someone trying to pick his lock.

He opened the front door and the would-be burglar sprayed some kind of substance in his face, according to the authorities. The victim managed to shut the door and the intruder ran off, law enforcement sources said.

Break-in breakdown

A pair of bungling bandits tried and failed to break open a N. Sixth Street automated teller machine with a crowbar on April 28, police reported.

The owner of the machine between Berry Street and Bedford Avenue told police the terrible twosome attacked it with a crowbar at 4:40 am. The duo damaged the machine, but could not get any money out, and eventually vamoosed, law enforcement officials related. The attempted burglary was captured on a surveillance camera, cops said.

Bag un-handed

A quick thief snatched a handbag from a woman lounging in McCarren Park on April 20, police said.

The victim reported that she had her purse next to her as she was sitting on a bench in McCarren Park at 5:40 pm when, suddenly, the scalawag came up from behind her, grabbed her bag off the bench, and ran out of the park via Bayard Street.

Someone later found the victim’s pouch on the street and returned it to her, but several items were missing, according to a report.

Trust exercise

A bandit rode off on a bicycle as a N. Seventh Street store owner was showing it to a potential customer on April 28, law enforcement officials related.

A clerk at a bike shop between the East River and Kent Avenue told police that he was outside the business showing the customer a Cannondale Bad Boy bicycle at 5:45 pm when a rapscallion ran up, jumped in the saddle, and rode off on it.

— Danielle Furfaro

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